Comments on Shab-e-Hijr

In response to a few questions on the comment-section, I am initiating another thread with explanations of various sort. Meaning, as requested by anonymous, will be the last part.

* The ghazal is my own creation. I wrote it in a few sporadic attempts totalling about 40 mins. It may have some errors and I apologize for the same.

* I will like to talk about a few metric siblings of these ghazals:

A few are by Shakeel Badayuni:-

meri zindagi hai zaalim
tere Gam se aashkaaraa
teraa Gam rahe salaamat
mujhe zindagii se pyaaraa

The meter and qawaafee of my Gazal matches with Shakeel's; thus the two are ham_zameen.

Gam-e-aashiqi se kah do
rah e aam tak na pahuNche
mujhe khauf hai ye tohamat
tere naam tak na pahuNche

and

rahaa Gardisho.n me haradam
mere ishq kaa sitaaraa
kabhii Dagmagaayee kashtii
kabhii kho gayaa kinaaraa

One metric sibling by Yahya~Jasdanwalla (my favorite):-

rah-e-aashiqi ke maare
rah-e-aam tak na pahuNche
kabhii subha tak na aaye
kabhii shaam tak na pahuNche

* Finally brief meaning of the ashaar (plural of sher):

1) Your beauty is un-witnessed within the span of my vision; O my moon! this star is craving for your radiance.

2) My grief in solitude increased just like stars appearing one by one on night sky; Tears blossomed in my eyes like flowers in springs.

3) I don't have a hope, I don't have a friend; My goal is out of sight, my support is missing as well.

4) I am craving for death, while my fate is everyday hitting on me; This person is being robbed of every now and then, while wandering destitutely.

5) The springs dawned daily arousing old fond memoirs; Due to intoxication of grief (in such a state), I cried your name with continuous sobbing.

6) Take my life away, but give me the pleasure of your (my beloved's) sight; I am not able to pass even one moment (happily) in solitude.


---- Hope you all enjoyed it.
Best regards,
Bhaaluu

PS: KEEP POSTING COMMENTS ON THE OTHER THREAD. LEAVE THIS THREAD UNCOMMENTED. Thanks!